Casting the (Intevitable) Tiger Woods Made-for-TV Movie

Much like any massive and dramatic news story nowadays, we're guessing the Tiger Woods sex affair scandal is sure to wind up as a (likely terrible) made-for-TV movie (we're thinking ESPN or Spike) at some point. So, rather than sit around and wait for it to actually get made, the PopEater crew went ahead and picked the cast to expedite the whole process. Wasn't that nice of us? So, after the jump, see who we picked to play Tiger, Elin, and all of the other ladies involved.

Tiger Woods
Role in Scandal: Famous golfer; alleged cheater
Who We Picked: Donald Faison
What He's Been In: 'Scrubs,' 'Clueless'
Why We Picked Him: Faison has always done comedy acting in the past, so we'd love to see what he can do with a serious, understated personality like that of Tiger.

Elin Nordegren
Role in Scandal: Swedish model; Tiger's wife
Who We Picked: Amy Smart
What She's Been In: 'Road Trip,' 'Crank'
Why We Picked Her:Simply put, few actresses (or humans) could be as beautiful as Tiger's supermodel wife ... but we think Amy comes pretty darn close. Her facial features are scarily similar to Elin's and her hair wouldn't require a whole lot of bleaching to get that Swedish look. Start sizing up those bikinis, Amy!

Rachel Uchitel
Role in Scandal: Alleged Mistress # 1
Who We Picked: Audrina Patridge
What She's Been In: 'The Hills,' 'Sorority Row'
Why We Picked Her: The aviator shades, the long brunette locks ... visually, Audrina seems like the dead-on choice to play the woman who started Tiger-gate. Another acting class or two, and we think this could be Emmy-worthy!

Jaimee Grubbs
Role in Scandal: Alleged Mistress # 2
Who We Picked: Rachel Bilson
What She's Been In: 'The O.C.,' 'Jumper'
Why We Picked Her:Rachel Bilson doesn't get enough work in our eyes. She's gorgeous in that unsuspected way that very few people have, and judging from what we've seen of Miss Grubbs, they share similarly puffy lips.

Kalika Moquin
Role in Scandal: Alleged Mistress # 3
Who We Picked: Minka Kelly
What She's Been In: 'Friday Night Lights,' '(500) Days of Summer'
Why We Picked Her: Sure, there's visual similarities, but the truth is that Miss Kelly has won our hearts as Lyla Garrity on 'FNL,' and we think more people should have the gift of Minka in their lives.

Gloria Allred
Role in Scandal: Lawyer to Rachel Uchitel
Who We Picked: Tina Fey
What She's Been In: 'SNL,' '30 Rock,' 'Mean Girls'
Why We Picked Her: As the world saw with Tina's flawless Sarah Palin impression during last year's election, the lady can sport a mean suit-jacket. Judging by her comedic chops that we've seen, we think she could pull off the caricature-esque methodology and stylings of Allred's career.

'Lost' promo that has 'Lost' fans-and even its producer-buzzing

Team Lost is keeping mum and staying dark about the contents of the show’s final season, set to premiere on February 2. The producers have even said they would rather not include any footage from the final slate of episodes in promos and advertising. Consequently, the show’s network partners around the world have been forced to come up with creative solutions for touting the show–and Lost’s Spanish carrier, Cuatro, has set the bar pretty damn high with a just-released promo that’s stirring a buzz storm among fans. It’s so cool, it even caused Lost exec producer Cartlon Cuse to tweet a rave via Twitter: “Best Lost promo I’ve ever seen…” If you haven’t seen it, you can check it out below.

So many things I love about this piece, from the ominous narration to the use of special effects to transpose characters like Ben, Locke, Sawyer and Kate from the show onto the chessboard motif. And how about that Four Toed Statue piece, brought down with a proverbial hand of God with so much thunder and shake! The poem definitely evokes the famous season 1 scene when Locke taught Walt about backgammon: “Two sides. Two players. One is light, the other is dark.” (Watch that scene again: not only filled with Jacob/Man In Black resonance, but just really, really, really poignant/creepy/cool.) I could do a big Doc Jensen investigation into the ad–but instead, I’m going to direct you to a Lost fan named Ms. Teri, who has a blog called “Lost For A Reason” and who has just posted a pretty great analysis of the promo and the poem. After you digest her sweet scholarship, come back her and check out my new column, which includes news about the forthcoming Lost season five DVD and some theory about Jacob and MIB. But before you do ANYTHING, answer these two questions: 1. What do you think of Lost’s minimal-to-no advertising strategy? 2. What do you think of the Spanish promo?

See ya: 'Ugly Betty' moving to Wednesdays

Since Ugly Betty got its groove back this season, only one thing’s been holding it back: that godawful Friday time slot! But thankfully, that problem will soon be solved. Sources confirm for me that the show’s moving to Wednesdays at 10 pm/ET, most likely when it returns from its holiday hiatus in January.

If you don’t think it’s good news that Betty is joining what will soon be ABC’s all-comedy night (even though the network isn’t confirming the schedule change yet), trust me, or trust Mike, who has to be among its biggest cheerleaders, you haven’t seen it lately. It’s great!

So what do you think? Will more viewers check out and/or return to the series when it escapes from its Friday purgatory and joins the Wednesday laffers? And if not, how sucktacular will that be? Debate below.

Breaking: 'Ugly Betty' hunk joins 'True Blood'

Where True Blood is concerned, people make an awful lotta jokes about fresh meat. But this time it seems unusually apropos: The HBO hit’s just added two slabs of beefcake to its season 3 lineup.

Grant Bowler (pictured, right), fondly remembered as Wilhelmina’s lamster lover Connor Owens on Ugly Betty, has been tapped to play Coot, the leader of a pack of werewolf bikers. And Theo Alexander (left), an up-and-comer whose resume is already full of guest appearances (Chuck, Pushing Daisies… ), has been cast as Talbot, the fanged significant other of Denis O’Hare’s Mississippi vampire king, Russell Edgington.

Opinions? You’ve got ‘em. I want ‘em.

First Look: Kudrow and Cox reunite on 'Cougar Town'

There will be something conspicuously missing when Friends costar Lisa Kudrow guests on Courteney Cox’s ABC sitcom, Cougar Town, on Jan. 6: friendship.

“They didn’t want to play friends,” says executive producer Bill Lawrence, who quickly came up with a different role for Kudrow. “She plays a dermatologist who is a horrible, horrible person, but [Cox] goes to her because she’s the best. The [sight] of them playing people who dislike each other intensely was very funny for me to watch.”

If the execution is half as funny as the set-up, I think this is going to be a winner. What do you think? Excited to see the friends morph into enemies?

Subway Guy Falls Off The Diet Wagon

Jared Fogle, a.k.a., "the Subway guy" was recently spotted in the Miami airport toting some extra baggage -- and not the kind on two wheels either.

Nearly a decade ago, we watched in awe when commercials aired about the young 20-year-old college student who lost 245 pounds by eating Subway sandwiches for lunch and dinner every day. Now we're watching again as the sandwich chain's spokesman has apparently fallen off his own diet.

While he still tweets about eating Subway (wouldn't you if you got free subs?), it appears the Subway guy has taken a break from eating fresh as much as he used to. According to Subway's web site, "Jared still enjoys his favorite SUBWAY sandwich, but has eased himself into eating other foods. He always chooses foods low in fat and limits the amount of alcoholic beverages. He still drinks only "diet" beverages and continues his walking regimen."

No one can blame a guy for wanting more of a variety of food -- after all, eating subs every day for years had to get kinda boring. But straying too far from his staple of turkey and veggie subs has obviously caused his waistline to spread as quickly as mayonnaise.

It appears Jared is still visiting schools and events across the country to promote the Jared Foundation which Subway established in 2004 to help fight childhood obesity and encourage kids to lead healthy lifestyles. As part of his presentation, he shows the crowd his iconic 60 inch fat pants. Just two months ago he told the kids at Thurman White Middle School in Nevada that staying healthy and keeping fit are "so important".

Let's hope those fat pants stay off the Subway guy and the extra toppings around his middle are just a temporary set-back.

Irate Parnevik on Tiger: I Hope She Uses Driver Next Time Instead of the 3-Iron

Jesper Parnevik has some advice for Tiger Woods.

"Maybe not just do it, like Nike says," Parnevik said Wednesday after finishing first-round play at the PGA Tour's final-stage of qualifying being held at Bear Lakes Country Club.

Parnevik was responding to Woods' admission Wednesday that he had apologized for being unfaithful to wife Elin.

Before Woods married the Swedish bikini model in October 2004, Elin Nordegren and her twin sister Josefin worked as au pairs for Jasper and Mia Parnevik.

They introduced the pair, something Parnevik now sounds like he regrets.

"I would be especially sad about it since I'm kind of -- I feel really sorry for Elin -- since me and my wife were at fault for hooking her up with him," Parnevik said. "We probably thought he was a better guy than he is. I would probably need to apologize to her and hope she uses a driver next time instead of the 3-iron."

Parnevik said he has had no contact with Woods since rumors and speculation began to circulate.

"It's a private thing of course," he said. "But when you are the guy he is, the world's best athlete, you should think more before you do stuff."