Steven Seagal has been a cop for 20 years?!?

The world has officially been turned upside down for me.

Apparently when he's not making bad-ass movies like Under Siege, Exit Wounds, or my personal favorite, Today You Die, Steven Seagal is a Deputy Sheriff in Jefferson Parish, Louisiana andhe's been doing it for 20 years.

Turns out that 20 years ago, while filming near his home in Jefferson Parish, he taught some cops a few skull-knockin' tricks and things turned out so well that they deputized him. The job stuck, because two decades later he's still at it.

America Voted: Audience Not Happy With Ellen on 'Idol'

Ellen DeGeneres is replacing Paula Abdul on 'American Idol,' after the 'Straight Up' singer quit her job this past August, but but the initial reaction to the news is that fans of the show aren't thrilled.

When asked if the talk show host would be a good replacement for Abdul, 55 percent of voters say no. Furthermore, when questioned if they thought it was fair that the singers would be judged by someone with no musical background, they answered that it was unfair.

Dressed to The Nines: Baby Arrives at 9 p.m. on 9/9/09, Weighing 9 Pounds

Henry Michael Berendes came into the world wearing his birthday suit, but he was still dressed to the 9s.

The LaCrosse Tribune in Wisconsin reports that the third child of local couple Chuck and Polly Berendes was born at 9:09 a.m. on Sept. 9 and weighed, of course, 9 pounds, 9 ounces at birth.

"I don't know how it happened, but it's pretty crazy," Chuck Berendes, 29, told the paper.

The couple joked about the possibility of a triple-nine birthday when Polly's doctor scheduled a C-section. Chuck even suggested how funny it would be if the baby arrived at 9:09 a.m.

He told the Tribune he forgot about the numbers until after little Henry was put on the scales for the first time.

"They measure in metric and the doctor did the math in his head, but to be sure, he had the nurse convert it," he told the paper. "When she said 9 pounds, 9 ounces, I started laughing and he started laughing."

Skin Whitener Ads Spark Outrage

Cosmetic advertisements in Asia are targeting men with blunt campaigns aimed at skin color that one lawmaker labels racist.

In one TV commercial, two men, one with dark skin, the other with light skin; stand on a balcony overlooking a neighborhood. The dark skin guy turns to his friend and says in Hindi, "I am unlucky because of my face." His light skin friend replies, "Not because of your face, because of the color of your face."

Suddenly the light skin guy throws his friend a cream. It's a whitening cream.

Embedded video from CNN Video

Sheen Declares '9/11 Story Is a Fraud'

Actor Charlie Sheen is known nowadays for his funny bone on 'Two and a Half Men,' but off-screen, Charlie's got a serious bone to pick with 9/11 and what most people think was behind it. So much, in fact, that he's demanding a meeting with President Barack Obama to discuss his views.Actor Charlie Sheen is known nowadays for his funny bone on 'Two and a Half Men,' but off-screen, Charlie's got a serious bone to pick with 9/11 and what most people think was behind it. So much, in fact, that he's demanding a meeting with President Barack Obama to discuss his views.

Sheen, who believes that the September 11 terror attacks were carried out by the U.S. government, gave an interview to PrisonPlanet.com in the form of a fictional conversation he'd like to have with President Obama. In it, Sheen -- a self-proclaimed '9/11 Truther,' a conspiracy theory group doubting official reports on 9/11 -- declares that "the official 9/11 story is a fraud."

Sheen goes on in his nonexistent conversation with the president to say that "9/11 has been the pretext for the systematic dismantling of our Constitution and Bill of Rights. Your administration is reading from the same playbook that the Bush administration foisted on America through documented secrecy and deception." He goes on to say that former President George Bush used the attacks as a way to create a war with Iraq.

In the "interview," Sheen says that there's a "bottomless warren of unanswered questions surrounding that day and its aftermath," referencing the John F. Kennedy assassination and the Gulf of Tonkin incident as other conspiracy talking points.

"Mr. President, I implore you based on the evidence you now possess, to use your Executive Power. Prove to us all Sir, that you do, in fact, care. Create a truly comprehensive and open Congressional investigation of 9/11 and its aftermath," Sheen writes, invoking the victims and families as the reason to do so.

Now do I believe in what Sheen is saying here about 9/11? Well, our country knew of the imminent attack on Pearl Harbor and did nothing so that we would enter WW2 why should we think that this time is any different?

Melrose Place - Review

The latest update of a treasured 1990s trash favorite, Melrose Place is cannily crammed with stars to please every age group, save for angry health-care-plan protesters. Whether new (Supernatural's Katie Cassidy as a delightfully cynical bisexual publicist), familiar (Melrose classic's Laura Leighton: sexy, silly Sydney), or familiar-yet-new (Ashlee Simpson-Wentz, stretching her wings post–7th Heaven), the Melrose cast remains reassuringly nutso.

The premiere culminates in a murder, but not before we meet Jonah (Swingtown's Michael Rady), an aspiring filmmaker who'll blackmail a movie producer, and Lauren (Stephanie Jacobsen), an indigent med-school student who'll do something randy to help pay her grad-school bills. (They may both be cute, but this is Melrose, baby.) Also central to the big-cast shenanigans is Melrose prime's Thomas Calabro, reprising his jaded Michael Mancini role but barely looking a decade older.

For this version to work, all the subplots and characters have to keep moving with precision, and the first episode, directed by Davis Guggenheim (An Inconvenient Truth), does a skillful job of that. But a nighttime soap is a marathon affair, and one that morphs as various characters take off with fans while others fade into the L.A. stucco. So it remains to be seen whether the new Melrose will become as giddily addictive as its predecessor — but it's off to a promisingly dizzy start. B

Melrose Place ratings not all that...

It might be time to speed up those Heather Locklear negotiations. The ratings for Tuesday night’s Melrose Place premiere are in and, well, they’re not great. The mega-hyped reboot averaged a disappointing 2.3 million viewers.

The show fared slightly better among its core young adult audience, placing second in the 9 pm hour. Also of positive note: Melrose was the No. 1 trending topic on Twitter last night for about an hour! (Hey, you take the wins where you can get ‘em).

The second season premiere of 90210 actually fared better with 2.6 million viewers, its highest viewer tally since last winter.
Did you watch either? Thoughts? (Melrose actually gets a lot better next week. Ditto 90210.)

Wedding Streaked in Revenge Prank

By now you've seen all the standard wedding pranks, like when the best man pretends that he's lost the ring ... or when all the bride's friends run past the ceremony totally naked.

It happened to one couple, in a photo recently popularized on Reddit.com. Though the identities of bride, groom, and streakers are unknown, the story behind it (allegedly) goes like this: Some college pals weren't quite ready to grow up when the first member of their group had a wedding -- so they decided to streak it. And ever since, there have been follow-up streakings at several subsequent ceremonies.

The anonymous trickster who posted the photos claims that the streaking won't end until everyone involved in the original episode has been a victim. Kind of like "Final Destination 3," but with more gratuitous nudity.

The anonymous trickster who posted the photos claims that the streaking won't end until everyone involved in the original episode has been a victim. Kind of like "Final Destination 3," but with more gratuitous nudity.

Runner Ignores Gender Scandal, Gets a Glam Makeover

n a perfect world, you'd know Caster Semenya as the teenage woman who can run half a mile in under two minutes. What you probably know her as is the athlete whose muscular physique prompted officials to order a test to verify her gender. But her femininity isn't a question at all in the "after" shots of her makeover from South African magazine You.

Ellen DeGeneres Replacing Paula Abdul as New 'American Idol' Judge

Your new 'American Idol' judge is ... Ellen DeGeneres!

Taking the seat left empty after Paula Abdul ended her 'Idol' contract over salary disputes this summer, DeGeneres will join Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson and Kara DioGuardi on the show's judging panel for the ninth season, premiering January 2010, in addition to continuing her daytime hosting gig. (Wonder who'll get the eliminated 'Idol' contestants to chat first now ...)

All I can say is Puh-leeeze! I don't see how this is a good thing. I love me some Ellen but NOT on American Idol. On the other hand if this bombs we'll have more ammo to get Paula back!

Bride-To-Be Dies After Extreme Crash Diet

Samantha Clowe never wanted to be a 'fat bride,' and now, sadly, she won't be one at all. The obese 34-year-old, who was looking forward to her upcoming nuptials, died after an intense crash diet. Described as "fit and healthy" by her family, Clowe lost 42 pounds in 11 weeks on the controversial Lighter Life Diet, which restricts dieters to just 500 calories a day.

We're all aware that crash diets aren't great for you, but you can die from them? You bet -- and this isn't even the first time this diet has killed someone. Just last December, a mother of five died after drinking 4 liters of water, as was recommended by the program. Amazingly, you need your doctor's consent to sign up for the program. Is anyone else having a hard time believing that a trained medical professional would give the OK for this kind of extreme diet?

Lighter Life, of course, claims no responsibility: "We were very sad to hear the news about Samantha ... but the coroner said it was very difficult to make such a connection (between Clowe's death and diet.)" Dr. Martin Scurr, medical correspondent for The Daily Mail notes that Clowe's death is "unlikely to be the fault of the diet itself," but thinks the stress the diet put on the heart was most probably the biggest contributor to her death.

The bottom line? A diet that involves fewer than 800 calories a day is unhealthy, downright dangerous and not worth the risk, regardless of how fabulous your skinny jeans are. It's such a shame that two desperate dieters have lost their lives before figuring this out, but we hope their stories can help keep others from making the same mistake.